anonymous quote..

I came across a quote on Pinterest the other day, and ignored it. Then I kept thinking about it, and tried to go back to find it, but I couldn't. But it was this or something like this..
'Have you prayed about it as much as you've talked about it'

Love it. I tend to talk or complain or vent to people who probably don't want to hear it anyways. Or shouldn't hear about it. There's so much more relief just to pray. That's going to be one of my New Years resolutions.

Most memorable Christmas Eve(s)

Tonight is Christmas Eve. Thinking about watching my son's face open his presents in the morning, has me just as excited as I felt waiting for the morning when I was a kid. My most memorable Christmas Eve is a tie. The one I got engaged, (which I will tell about in detail separately) and one that probably wouldn't be considered happy, but all the same was wonderful. If that makes sense.
The year was 1998. Do you like how I said that like I'm a legit story teller? :) I was 15 years old. My daddy was very sick with cancer. My older brother was home from college. I remember him coming home and telling me 'man, dad looks bad. Looks really bad. I don't know how I'm going to able to do this, seeing him like this.' As I look back now, as an adult, I realize how tough it was. Tough to see my daddy...the daddy who's rough callused (sp?) hands scratched my back every night, his strong arms lifted bails of hay in 90+ degree weather, he carried me on his back (even when I was 14 and we were at disney world and I was sick of walking!), he did push ups and sit-ups every morning at the crack of dawn, chin ups on the basement bar, ran 5k races, and even did 20 pushups as soon as he was in the recovery room of his first cancer surgery. And then to see him at a state where he's just around 100lbs of skin and bones and hasn't been able to eat real food in months, just shakes of ground up food. His face is so deformed from the tumor, that no one would recognize him. His speech is hard to understand and the pain medication makes him act like he's not himself sometimes. This was the scene of my junior year of high school.
This particular Christmas Eve, he was in a bad amount of pain. He was one tough dude and I don't throw that around. So the fact that he was really struggling this night was hard. I remember he wanted to call 'Bob'.
Bob is a family friend. He is our family chiropractor, but that's a minor description on what he is. Him and his family are some of the most generous people you will ever meet. His son Jay, is my brother's age and they have been friends for about 25 years. Steph is Bob's daughter. But no, she is my best friend. We stood up in each other's weddings, cried together when life changed, laughed together over things we shouldn't laugh about, fought through eating disorders, and talked out hours of parenting/marriage/life/spiritual issues that you would only share with your deepest friend.
So when my dad was feeling so physically bad that night, he only felt comfortable to call 'Dr. Bob'. Who, minor detail, is THE best chiropractor ever. It was Christmas Eve, and they have a big family and fun traditions. I don't know how that phone call went, but I remember my parents loading us in the van to go to the Benningfield's..on Christmas Eve. Last minute. And I was excited to see my friend, and maybe have my daddy get some relief.
If you are in work for yourself, like my husband is, you groan when a customer calls you last minute to come 'fix' something. Especially on your days off. Especially on something like Christmas Eve. But not the Benningfields. They had us come right away and didn't make us feel like we were a burden. In fact, Steph had a gift waiting for me when I walked in the door. And I had one for her. BUT what's funny about this, is that we both 're-gifted'haha! We totally laugh about this to this day. I remember scrambling and grabbing a picture frame I had. And she had scrambled and grabbed some Bath and Body works lotion she had received.
I remember my dad leaving there feeling physically better. And all of us feeling better emotionally. And grateful. So thankful. In a way, I feel like it saved Christmas. That family's unselfish generosity that seemed so second nature for them, is something I will never forget.
That was the last Christmas I had with my daddy. And I am grateful that it was so memorable. I remember we got a tv that year, a tv that is now obsolete. Who freakin' cares about that tv? This was the stuff that matters.

Christmas diamond

One of the best memories of my childhood Christmas's, didn't involve a present I received, but one my mom did. Although, I could probably write about ten posts on Christmas memories. But then again, you can just go borrow my mom's VHS tapes because OUR ENTIRE CHILDHOOD IS VIDEOTAPED! I believe in the video camera, believe me I DO. But man, mom, there's a LOT of footage..
Anyways, this one was on tape and if I had the tech savy-ness to upload, I would love to. It was the Christmas my dad got my mom a new diamond ring.
The back story, is that my dad had a serious girlfriend before my mother. He had bought a ring, and was going to propose. I can't remember why, but he broke up with her before they got engaged and he held onto the ring. Into the picture comes my mother. They date, fall in love, and he's ready to propose. Hey, how convenient, he's got a ring already! haha, so my mom always gave him a little crap about that. Gosh, I don't blame her.
If you don't know my background: we didn't have a lot of money. Which I honestly have never thought of as a bad thing. All about perspective, and ours was good. We were rich in love and life and my daddy worked hard for everything we did have. And we were content. Our needs were met. We lived on a farm, and that farm was a child'd dream with endless hours of freedom and fun. But Christmas meant a lot of garage sale toys some years.
This particular Christmas I think I was 8 or so. Mom opened a gift from my dad and started crying immediately. No surprise there. But it was a happy/shock cry. He had given her a diamond ring. And he said it was all for her, with a little chuckle. She's just staring at it, crying, etc. And she asked him how he was able to afford it. He said 'I sold a steer'. That made her cry more. You see, those cows meant a lot to him. They were his hobby, his investment, his hardwork, his babies etc. And to sell one off like that, was a big sacrifice. And it tickles me. Think about it: 'how'd ya afford this here ring, honey?' "well darlin', I sold me a steer". It sounds pretty hick, haha. But to me as a young girl, I thought it was just another gushy thing my parents were doing that I didn't understand. Now that I'm an adult, I reflect on it as a beautiful act of love!

Scarves

If you know me, you know that you should NEVER take fashion advice from me. Or my husband. My husbands style can't be summed up. He'll wear snakeskin loafers with knee high socks, mesh shorts, a Hurley skate or surf shirt(whichever one of those Hurley is? Regardless, CJ is neither) and a had with some sort of tool company or farm equipment on it. Picture this outfit if you can, because it's real, and it exists. And he wears these things shamelessly.
Regardless of how he dresses, I am very thankful he doesn't wear scarves. I hate to admit that I instantly judge men who wear scarves. That's wrong, I know, and I should work on it. But if they are doing it to accessorize or jazz up their look, why not just wear a broach, or some nice costume jewelry. And if they are really doing it to keep their neck warm, they might as well wear a giant, bushy sweater turtleneck because those look just as terrible.
So to my CJ, you may not be real 'hip', but I dig your style. Most of the time.

I'm going to pack better lunches

Hayes started a 'preschool' this week. It's for 2 year olds, so they can't be learning much. But our pediatrician said it might help Hayes get along with others. In other words, it might teach him not to cold cock punch a kid in the face for no reason, or push over a boy who's just minding his own business, or pull a girls hair who's just sitting quietly etc. These have been common activities Hayes has pulled while at play dates, play grounds etc. He's independent, strong willed, defiant and we are trying to learn how to channel it. This pre school might help him learn to obey authority better, and develop social skills that don't result in immediate punishment or removal from the party.
His first day went a little rough. Several altercations, I guess. Lost of shoving, violence etc. for no reason. My concern was that he would get kicked out in his first week. The teachers were very nice, but you have to do what's best for ALL the kids. And if all the kids are getting bullied for no reason, someone might have to go.
Today was day 2. I prayed for a better report and I got it! There were still issues of unprovoked violence on Hayes' part, but overall, not as many. When I hear my child ONLY attacked another child a couple times, this is a GOOD THING!
However, I think I may need to pack Hayes a better lunch. When I was a kid, my mom packed the worst lunches. Well, at least from a kids standpoint. They were super healthy and dry and bland. Everything was from the health food store, or Aldi's. Which isn't fun or cool. NO ONE ever wanted to trade their oreo's or doritos for my rotten banana or whole wheat pretzels that were probably stale. Now that I'm a mom though, I caught myself doing the same healthy lunch for my two year old. WELL turns out, the other children had the 'good' lunches. With some cookies.
So today while the teachers had their backs turned, and before they could stop him, Hayes made a run for it. Did a lap around the table of little kids and stole their cookies right out from under them. Had someone's chocolate milk (I, of course packed him water) in his mouth before anyone could get to him. Kids were crying, but it was too late. Oooh Hayes, I think it's safe to say he's not making any friends in there yet:) But man, is that pretty freakin' funny!!

Honest Abe

Do you remember the story of Abe Lincoln when he walked like miles in the snow (I don't know history well) to return like a few cents that the store owner had given him extra by accident? Well, he did. And that's where he got the name honest Abe. That's one of the few academic things I remember from my school days.
Today, I went to the bank. I was taking out a bit of cash. She handed me my cash in an envelope, sent a sucker through for Hayes, and we went on home. When I got home, I noticed she gave me more cash than I asked for, but didn't debit that extra from my account. So, I called the bank and told them of their mistake. Now, before you go thinking how honest I am and what a good person I am, know that I did this partly because it's the 'right thing to do'. But if I'm being 100% honest, partly because I thought maybe something good would happen or I expected the bank to pat me on the back, spread the word on what a wonderful customer I am, and THEN just let me keep the $100 anyways for being honest!
Haha, I actually love better how they handled it. They asked me drive all the way back to the bank and return the money. Meaning, pack up your two car-seat riding children, into the rain, and drive back to the bank. And then give them the money back.
One of those moments where I checked myself. I had to realize that if we decide to do the right thing for the wrong reasons, we may as well have done the wrong thing. ;)

How to get a baby to sleep through the night

Both of my children have slept through the night (for the most part) by 6-8 weeks. Lots of people ask how I do it. Here's some tips in case I forget or am not around to help out my little Bria when she gives me some grand babies! These are tips from the NEWBORN STAGE(first couple weeks). If the baby is older, I have many tips for that too. But remember, I'm no doctor. Or actually, even expert for that matter. So only treat me like one if this works for you;)

1 Feed them every 2 hours from 8am-6pm.

Starting at 8 am, wake the baby if she is sleeping. Wake her and feed her. Even if she 'falls asleep at the wheel', try and tickle her, take off her shirt to rest against you etc to get her to wake and at least get a little feeding. Don't force it though.

2 Starting at 5:30, give her a sponge bath. Docs say don't bathe every day, I do. They will start to pick up a pattern. Also, they sleep ALL day and are barely active. This will wake them up and wear them out one last time before the night. Rub 'em down with some baby oil so their skin doesn't get dried out.

3 Give them one last feeding. In the room they are going to sleep in, with the lights down, sing a song..one that can always be sung at bedtime. I think they will start to associate it with bedtime eventually.

4 Let them sleep on their tummy if they want. Again, docs say NO. But when I was a baby they said NEVER put a baby on your back. I think our bodies rest best when they are most comfortable. For me, and turns out my babies, it's on their tummies. Not all babies LIKE tummy sleeping though.

5 When you get up for night feedings, try and keep the lights low, room quiet. Change their diaper FIRST. This will wake them up a bit, but it's better now than right after they've eaten and fallen asleep again. Otherwise you wake them up all over and it can be difficult to get them to settle again.

6 Introduce a paci or get them to self sooth on their thumb. Again, only if they don't settle easy on their own. Do this if they are fussy and can't fall back asleep at night. Get them used to it, so when you lay them down without the comfort of your body, at least they will still have something they like.

--Things to try to get a baby to shut up when you know she's tired. And you know that if her diaper is changed, full tummy, she's not sick or uncomfortable. That means all her needs are met, so she's probably crabby because she needs SLEEP. Rock her, shush her, bounce up and down, hold her over your arm on her tummy, run water in the sink, walk her in a baby wrap and DON'T transfer her to the bed/resting place until she's been in a deep phase of sleep for awhile. REM sleep.

Baby food jars

Oh Hayes, if you ONLY knew how MAD your dad was today when he had to plunge the toilet numerous times, make a trip to the Home Depot, tear the toilet completely off so he could fix it, OR if you only knew how much disgusting human waste I had to bleach off of our bathroom floor, or the bathroom mats I threw away, or the Juicy Couture (It was a gift from being in a wedding) velore suit I had to throw out because of the sewer mess...Well, if you only knew what this all entailed, maybe you wouldn't have thrown..not one, but THREE small glass baby food jars down the toilet. But then again maybe you would have?

Running

My daddy was a great runner. He jogged in the snow, in the heat, in the sand or wherever he could. He always kept himself in great shape. Him and mom did a lot of 5k's growing up. Mom would just walk, and barely beat the 10k runners. In fact, she said she saw them coming up on her while she was getting close to the finish line. So she decided to start running herself, and cross the line as if she was one of the first 10k runners to finish:) Adam and I did the Wenona 5k with mom and dad one year. I would say I was about 9 and Adam around 11...his very 'husky' days. It was an extremely hot, humid day. I'm pretty sure we were just doing a 1 mile 'fun run' for the kids. But it really didn't matter, because Adam ended up in the Ambulance they had sitting there for such an occasion. He got heat exhaustion, or at least faked heat exhaustion to get out of the heat and into the only air conditioned room anywhere for miles. I, for one, was not upset at all. Or even worried. See, I remember thinking he was faking. And I would typically call him out on it. But this time, I let it ride because I got to stop running and sit in the ambulance with him:)

I took up running again after my dad died. Steph, Abby, Sarah and I would get dropped off at 116, and run back to the house, giving the illusion that we had run all the way to 116 and were now running back (when really we had just done the way back), all timed perfectly of course to when most of the boys would be driving home from football practice. Running came kind of surprisingly easy to me? And I remember feeling regret that I hadn't done it more, or tried it with my dad while he was alive.

This year Brittany got me to sign up for a 5k and I'm happy to say that I completed it. Barely. In fact, CJ was waiting with the kids at the finish line, with Brit who had already been finished for 5 minutes. He was getting worried. He told me later that he thought I gave up and was crawling around looking for a pay phone or that he should start driving to go find me. Sheesh, it only took me 36 minutes! And when Brit spotted me in the distance, CJ didn't believe it was me. He said I 'looked terrible, and sick''.

Well, that had to have been true because that's exactly how I felt. I still don't know which mile was the worst? I figured the first would be easiest. But then I saw the sign that said 'mile 1', and I couldn't believe it. I remember feeling like I had been running for at least an hour and was already sick of the songs on my ipod. Then I just kept waiting for a water station so I could use it as an excuse to walk (as to not spill the water, duh). But that water station didn't come for like 2 more years! AND the water was warm and was like drinking sand because I needed more! But I couldn't just hang out at the water station.

Then mile 2 I thought about my dad. I kept looking up into the sky for him. And I have to say the temperature was perfect, and the sky was so blue. I was just looking up and running and wondering if he was running. Wondering what it would be like to run with him someday. Sounds beautiful and inspiring, but it only lasted like 3 minutes until that feeling of barfing came back. Then by the 3rd mile I was just completely pissed off. I just was mad at myself that I allowed myself to be stuck in this stupid race for the next mile. Mile that was taking forever. My ipod songs weren't distracting me enough. Nothing was motivating me. I thought 'oh, maybe I'll envision the kids at the finish line waiting for their mommy to come leaping across'. That didn't work because then I got depressed thinking that this was the first time I had been away and alone from them in a long time and I was wasting it on this stupid race.

Anyways, I finished the race. And I sped up towards the finish line, looked over at my family and acted like I was going to throw up. I thought it would be funny to make a barf sound. Well, I pissed my pants when I did that. No joke, pee came out as I was crossing the line. Then I picked up Bria and wanted people to see how little she was so that maybe people would be thinking 'wow, did she JUST have that baby? What a woman she must be!''

Bria 4 months

Bria, you were 4 months old yesterday! And I forgot to take a picture with one of my crappy homeade signs. But I am writing this, and I will post a picture too.

You have to be the sweetest baby, ever. You wake up smiling, you go to be smiling. You don't know a stranger, and your favorite place is in someones arms. You are starting to laugh at your big brother. AND he has made big strides with you! He now asks for you a few times a day "BEE-AH". And he is the first to let me know if you are making noise and up from your nap. He held you for about 4 seconds this weekend. That was the first time! After the 4 seconds, he started to say 'No, No...' It was sweet while it lasted though.

You are still sleeping 12 hours straight at night, with exception to last night when you woke up about 6 times. You have a little runny nose and you wake up every time you roll over onto your back. But we just roll you back on your tummy, and you take your little fist and put it in your mouth and start sucking. You are really starting to like tummy time too!

Last week, your daddy checked on you before he came up to bed. Then he came in our bedroom and said the sweetest things. He looked at me and said "I love her so much. Does she do anything wrong? I don't know, I just want to buy her everything she ever wants!" We love you, Bria!

Spoke too soon..

Hayes, add to these last 7 days:

-You pulled the 5ft coat hanger down on top of you and were trapped under it.

-You did a face plant into concrete while pushing a toy truck. You cried for less than 30 seconds. Today, when I was tickling you and you were laughing really hard, I saw your teeth. Your front, top, 'most popular tooth' is split almost in half and looks like it's about to fall out. It's Sunday, and tomorrow's a holiday. So we have a message into the dentist....

All in one day for Hayes

Funny how I had posted that story about Hayes and the knife earlier, when yesterday he went a step further with multiple knives. And what this video left out (because it was still to happen a few hours later), is that Hayes drank gasoline tonight!!!! Yum. My kind, considerate husband came home from work and relieved me of Hayes duties by taking him outside to play while CJ started to mow the lawn. He turned around to find Hayes with the gasoline can tilted up to his lips. A gasoline can that CJ says he doesn't even know how Hayes could lift it because it was heavy. Well, he did. We called poison control after I did a breath test on Hayes. He wreaked of gas, but we weren't sure if it just spilled or it was in his mouth. His mouth smelled like gas, so yeah. Turns out you can drink gasoline and be ok! I have a feeling that he would have been ok regardless ;)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6nF0jWA_6Bc

Never trust the silence

This could have been an extension of the last entry. Hayes was in time-out yesterday (which never works, by the way) and he was surprisingly quiet. I don't trust that silence. I walked into his room to discover Desitin diaper rash creme smashed into the carpet, rubbed all over his clothes, in his hair, and even a creme mustache. I would have gotten a better picture, but I was too mad. And this stuff does NOT come out.

Unsettling discoveries

There are times as a parent when you walk into a situation with your child and there aren't really words to describe it, but just 'unsettling'. This was one such discovery. And of course, the star of this story is once again: Hayes.

Hayes likes to get up early. Well, early for two parents that aren't morning people. Bria, she's a little more up our alley. PRETTY lazy baby, that one. So sometimes when Hayes starts knocking on his bedroom door, calling for us, we just let him out like he's a dog, and then go back and lay down. He's pretty independent, so he just plays downstairs, helps himself to some cereal, cooks some eggs (joking). Well, I started to feel a bit uneasy about his silence this particular morning so I crawled out of bed and came downstairs. And there he was sitting silently at the kitchen table, with a large knife in his hand. And he was starring at me like he was about to do something crazy.

Walking up on this situation is probably how people feel when they come across a live bear in the woods. You know you need to act fast, but you don't want to make any fast movements. Hayes is about as unpredictably violent as a neighbors pitbull. He might comply right away, or he might just punch you in the face, or in this case, swing a knife at you. Yes, this is how scared I am of our 21 month old son. Luckily, thank the LORD, this was a pretty painless knife-from-toddlers-hand-removal. I didn't get a picture, as taking the time to do that might have caused a different outcome. But I did take a picture of the knife in MY hand. It's pretty big.

Bria's name

This is the first time Hayes referred to Bria by her name, and not just 'baby'. It's also the first time I really have a picture of the two of them together. That's because Hayes only pays attention to her if he's trying to hurt her. This was a great moment!

Midnight Barfs

Hayes, you aren't the most cuddly boy I've been around. In face, I think I can count on my one hand how many times you've shown me affection. It's sad. Someday though, I think you'll change. I'm DYING to just hold you close without you pushing me away! But I'm also thankful for your independence;)

That being said, your dad and I were super excited when you woke up crying in the middle of the night. We weren't excited because you were crying, but because the only thing we could think to do with you (you didn't want milk, and you weren't having a nightmere) was put you in bed with us. You laid between us in the dark and we were super excited:) You have NEVER wanted to do this. Of course you brought your giant yellow duck which you call 'caw caw'. Which by the way, why is that the stuffed animal that you've become so attached to? You have about 15 regular sized animals on your bed, but you chose to carry around this giant duck that looks like you won it at the fair.

Anyways, as we are laying in bed with you, about to fall back asleep at about 1:30 am, you were still kind of whining. Then it happened. Sounded like a burp then a cough then I just felt warmth. And I smelled barf. Then you did it again...a few more times. This time all over dad and the bed. The moments that followed I wish had been on tape. Just your dad and I scrambling in the dark, trying to take cover from your spilling mouth, but nowhere to go. It was starting to scare you so I had to bring you in for the most uncomfortable cuddle of my life. Just holding you, smashing the vomit in between our bodies. It was a barf hug, I guess. Then we turned the lights on. and we all looked terrible. I put you in the bath, stripped the sheets and changed clothes.

Notice I said that I changed clothes...still not sure if your dad has and that was a few nights ago. Anyways, you still wouldn't go back to sleep, poor little guy. You were still whining and miserable. We took you to the basement and I just wanted to comfort you in front of a good Wiggles dvd. But you didn't want me of course. Just 'dada'. Part of me was just aching to hold you and rock you. And the other part was a little relieved that CJ had to stay up and cater to your every whine:) I'm sure my time will come, maybe when you're older, where I will have more than just one puke hug before you ask for dad:)

You know you're a housewife when...

1. You spend half the day trying to think of ways to bring in more money and the other half of the day spending money

2. You are consciously trying NOT to post an update on Facebook about your children, in fear of looking like 'that housewife'

3. You get excited when you get to the store with only ONE child along

4. Your husband walks in the door, and you panic for no reason and try to act busy like he's your boss?

5. The days of the week you actually put on makeup and real clothes depend on if it's grocery day, therefore getting out of the house

6. You've gone through the trouble to sit down and write out 'you know you're a housewife when'.

7. You have some sort of little 'hobby' you do when you're alone that is secretly probably something more like an addiction. examples: drinking, smoking, computer games, facebook picture stalking, or shopping with a credit card the rest of the family doesn't know you have.

8. You carry a wooden spoon with you at all times around the house, so you can be ready to spank a child at any time.

9. You are most stressed out during the kids naptimes(which should be the least stressful), because you are second guessing if you should be spending this precious time differently.

I'm sure this list will grow by leaps and bounds over the next months and years:)

Heat and hard work

This is a shout out to my husband who works so hard for us! I can write this without making him blush, because I'm not really sure he knows this blog is here?

Yesterday it got to 101 degrees here in Kansas City. CJ was working outside in the sun replacing siding on a house. I prayed for him all day because it makes me nervous. But it also makes me respect him. Most men today sit in a cool office all day and make twice as much money to do it. Maybe they're happy, maybe they're not? CJ truly loves what he does. On days like today, I doubt it's much fun, but he does it because he loves his family. I grew up with a father who also worked outside most of the time. Just because it got to 100 degrees, didn't mean the hay didn't need to be bailed. And just because the windchill was below 0 degrees, didn't mean the cows didn't need to be fed and the chores done outside. There is something about a man who just does it because it needs to be done and doesn't complain about it. And both my father, and my husband didn't complain.

CJ, I love you and am grateful for the hard work you put in for our little family. I'm a lucky gal, and you are more appreciated than you'll ever know.

I guess I should also point out that I'm PREtty sure CJ got heat stroke today...oops! He called first saying that he thought he pulled a rib muscle? Then when he got home, a bad headache started, shortness of breath and some chest pains. Pretty soon, CJ was googling 'getting poisoned' and 'heart attack'...oh boy. Needless to say, he is feeling better. So glad he wasn't 'poisoned'.

hayes and gold bond

Siblings

When I was an infant, supposedly my 2 1/2 year old brother came walking into the kitchen with his hands around my neck, I was turning blue, and he told my mom 'here mom, she was crying.' I guess my mom about fainted.

My uncle Rick also told me that he saw about the best body slam ever done by my brother, to me, as I was a baby laying on the floor. It wasn't a fluke either, it was my brother jumping from the couch, onto the floor yelling 'body Slaaaammm!'

These stories are funny to me. Little did I know, that my son would top these stories times ten. Hayes, these are for your enjoyment when you are older, to reflect and laugh about what you did to your tiny baby sister. Right now, they are just mean and make me stressed out. But if I don't write them down, we will forget they ever happened!

1. You headbutted her sooo hard that dad could hear her little skull vibrate. You also did it another time right to her nose right after you faked us out and acted like you were going to kiss her.

2. Dad was holding Bria, and you walked by with your thumb in your mouth. Without even stopping or looking over, you just SLAPPED the baby on the face and kept walking. As if to make the statement 'there's that baby that I hate'.

3. I thought she was safe in her crib, but you reached through and tried to pull her through the crib bars by her tiny little legs.

4. You tried to smother her by sitting on her while she was in her car seat.

5. You climbed onto the changing table, grabbed her by the head like you were going to kiss her again, but you bit her nose.

6. You tried to gouge out her eye with a pretzel stick.

7. Yesterday, you shoved a cracker in her tiny 6-week-old mouth while she was in the swing.

8. And numerous pinches, and scratches to various parts of the body.

She is only 6 weeks old, and is already like a cat with 9 lives. Pretty soon, I believe she will be able to fight back and will be meaner than you are! But remember, there will be a time shortly where you will want to protect her from everything. She will be your best friend and someday all your friends might hit on her and it will drive you crazy. Take good care of her and always have her back. Because remember, you OWE her big time;)

Bria Elaine Youngkin

She joined our family on May 18th, 2011. Never thought I would love a little girl sooo much. She's an angel. Now I KIND OF understand why my mom named her daughter Summer Angel...because these little girls just seem so perfect.

Labor was so different compared to Hayes' because I really didn't 'labor' at all! The c-section went smoothly and the surgery itself and even recovery really seemed like a breeze! I did try and over-do it at first and ended up fainting in the shower at the hospital. Nothing like waking by smelling salts in your nostrils and looking up to see your husband and 3 nurses staring back at you as you sit naked in the shower.

Hayes tried to murder Bria about 20 times in her first couple weeks. Bria, I feel so sad for you! You will be tough, though, and probably learn to hit him hard before we know it. So far, Hayes has headbutted you in the nose, pinched you, bit your head, scratched your arms and head, tried to gouge your eye with his pretzel rod. You aren't safe anywhere but in our arms. I thought you would be safe in the crib, but he even put his arm through and tried to pull you through the crib bars by your little legs. These last few days he's been sweeter to you and getting interested in seeing the 'babbie' as he calls you.

Life is for sure a lot busier with two kids and the ages that they are. Last night was CJ and I's first time out without kids. He informed me that he'd like to have a total of 4 kids! It will be interesting to see where that leads in the future years:)

Child/life update

I like to blog about memories, but also want to have memories of the present. So here is what's going on with us at this stage in our life.

I'm 30 weeks pregnant with an unnamed baby girl. So far, I'd say this pregnancy has been easier in some ways, harder in others. I haven't gained AS much weight(yet), and I didn't get the horrible acne as I did with Hayes. However, the first trimester was a lot harder. Was sick all day, and barfed sometimes 5 times a day..if I had any food I could choke down. Being nauseated with a toddler makes it more difficult too. Also had a 28 day sinus infection that was one of the worst/longest viruses I can remember? Couldn't breathe, and therefore couldn't sleep. Thank God it's gone away for the most part. I thank I owe it to the shots of apple cider vinegar I took! I now have pretty bad tooth pain, and I can see either a crack or decay/cavity on the tooth that hurts. Go in next week to hopefully get some relief. I'm pretty much complaining here, but I'm actually a lot more comfortable on my feet this pregnancy. Feel lighter and and am sleeping more comfortably.

Hayes will be 16 months tomorrow. He's been throwing his share of tantrums, but also turning a LITTLE more cuddly and sweet. Yesterday he went up to Uncle Adam and gave him a kiss and said 'hi'. He's never given a kiss before, moreless on his own! It was super sweet. He developed a rash this last week which the dermatologist at Childrens Mercy does not know what it is? Treating it symptomatically and it seems to be getting better. He also wants to eat sweets and cookies all day long, just like his pregnant momma...who happened to have chocolate chip cookies for breakfast today :/

C.J. is super busy with work, which is great! He's doing an awesome job and I couldn't be a more proud wife. His eating habits are worse than Hayes and mine combined but seems to stay fairly healthy somehow?

Hopefully we close on our new house on Ascot Circle in the next few weeks. Looking forward to moving into OUR OWN home and raising our little family there. We are so blessed. Can't wait to set up a nursery for this baby girl and then have this baby girl to hold!

Changes

I know, I always apologize that I don't keep this thing updated. I REALLY have difficulties with logging in, and then I get frustrated and quit.

That being said, there are some changes in this house! For one, I'm pregnant with baby number 2! This one is a baby girl, who of course has no name yet. The pregnancy was tough at the beginning again, with weeks of puking every day. This time seemed worse as the nausea lasted all day and I ended up losing 9 lbs before I could put on any wait. Now I am almost 29 weeks! I am on day 18 of a sinus infection that won't go away...but I feel like this last 24 hours might be an improvement.

Also, we bought a house! We knew we would have to move eventually with Mom and Bob moving back. We decided this was the time to do it as the rates are very low, and home prices are low. We found our home and are just waiting on the closing date. Hopefully it is before May 18th...that's the day my c section is scheduled and we get to meet our baby girl!

C.J.'s work has stayed really busy, and this year we plan on growing the business, getting a new website and possibly hiring another employee to help C.J.

God's blessed us. Seriously. All thanks to Him!

Hayes 15 months

Wow, I think this is the first picture I have on my blog!? Yikes I'm slow. This is Hayes at 15 months. Yes, he has some teeth on him! What did you expect? Both his parents have piano keys for teeth.

He is starting to look more and more like his daddy all the time, but still has those sparkly blue eyes. He still loves to suck his thumb, dance to music, watch his dvd's, ask for cookies, eat cookies, and sleep. He is still a pretty mellow guy for the most part. And a HUGE daddy's boy. I'm with him all day, but as soon as daddy goes off to work, he waits at the window and sometimes cries for awhile saying 'dada'. He also loves his uncle Adam and thinks he's the funniest thing around. Well Hayes, he's not. But you can think that for now. He skypes with grandma coi coi and asks for her when he sees the computer. He has around 15 words we can understand. With the latest being 'baby'. He's a very well behaved little boy, but is starting to give scowls and dirty looks on a regular basis for no reason?

He still loves books and is getting into balls and learning to throw them.

He started a swim class with mommy this week and had to be removed from class for a few minutes for an attitude meltdown. After that he did better and had fun splashing around. He still doesn't like to cuddle except for with daddy and uncle adam on occasion. Other than that, he's pretty independent! He's getting goofy and he is so much fun to love!

Grandma

Now that I have a little one, I'm so blessed to have 2 wonderful grandmas in his life. My wonderful mother, and my wonderful mother-in-law. Hayes (and the baby girl coming in 2 months) won't know how lucky they are:)

It made me think back to my grandma and how much I loved her. My little ones and my husband will never get to meet her. But I wanted to write a little about her so that her great-grandchildren can read this later and get to know what she was like.

Her name was Betty (Winkler) Belsly and she was a lot a woman! It seemed, at least when we were little, that she towered over grandpa physically. And she was a good cook. Always making really good tasting foods that probably weren't very good for you. She always had her hair done neatly with these fluffy curls. I used to love to feel the hairspray/stiffness when she came right back from getting it done. She was loving and welcoming. And because she was a big woman, she seemed so much more fun to cuddle with! :)

Going to her house was so fun for me. First of all, her and grandpa lived on the farm. My cousins lived down the street and it was just fun to have all this family in close quarters. Their farmhouse always had a bowl of peanut m&ms(I don't like those) a bowl of skittles in the dining room, and a bowl of regualr m&ms in the living room. ALWAYS refilled, always available. She had a separate refrigerator out in the shed. This was always filled with cream soda, root beer, grape soda and other delicious drinks. Her pantry always had vanilla sandwich creme cookies, and there was always a block of valveeta cheese in the fridge to have cheese and crackers. And man, she made the best grilled cheese sandwiches ever. And fried potatoes for breakfast after you spent the night. As a kid, these little things are what you remember about going to grandma's. Pure spoiled gluttony that you never got at home!

And she had a 'playroom' and I SWEAR that she always seemed to clean it up after us? But it had fun toys and dress-up clothes.

Grandma was also the best gift giver. At Christmas and birthdays, you never got something from her that would need to be returned. She just knew! And she threw a birthday party for every grandchild, on Sundays. I remember being really anxious sitting through church knowing we'd get to go over for a party after sunday school. And it didn't matter that it wasn't MY birthday, because she always made us all feel special: All of us grandkids would get a gift bag just because. Always had a fun little toy, or some money and candy. She did that for years! So thoughtful. And she always made a fresh cake by hand. These little acts of love that I hope I can do when I'm a grandma!

Grandma died when I was in high school. I remember getting called out of class and going to the office with Adam and cousin Jaymie to tell us that she wasn't doing well. I'm glad we got to leave school for the day and go to the hospital and we literally got to see her take her last breaths. A couple years later, I worked at the pharmacy after school most days. I remember delivering prescriptions to an elderly woman in Spring Bay and I don't remember her name. But she lived alone and was asking my name. When I told her I was a Belsly, she started to get choked up. She told me that Grandma and her were in a Bible Study together and that Grandma was one of the most wonderful people she knew. She said she could call her at anytime and ask her questions about God and she would make her feel better. It made me proud! And it's true...I remember calling her on the phone as a child because I had the number memorized. She would always answer and talk, she never made you feel like you were wasting her time. I even called her crying once when I was trying to help deliver a little of kittens on my sidewalk that kept coming out dead! She was calming and sweet and stayed on the phone with me the whole time.