Wednesday, August 19, 2009

I LOVE ANIMALS...They're delicious

As a child, I wanted to be a vet or at least take care of animals for the rest of my life. I literally had hundreds of cats (spread out over several years), puppies, chickens, cows, a few rabbits, a guinea pig for a few days, and probably more that I'm trying to forget. I would sneak kittens into the house and dress them in my doll clothes trying to turn them into babies, and would hand feed with an eye dropper any kitten who had lost his mother to a highway death. I loved these cats so much, they even gave me worms. We won't get into that. Watching cows be born, fetching eggs from the chickens, and crying so many tears over the deaths of every puppy and kitten that we eventually lost.
I'm not sure what happened over the years, but now, I really can't stand animals. I can't stand pet hair, I can't stand to be jumped on by peoples dogs, I can't stand being licked, I hate being barked at by a strange dog for no reason when I'm taking a walk, I can't stand how they poop wherever they want, and expect you to show them attention. I can't stand how people are so quick to help a 'homeless' animal, but wouldn't bother to help an orphan or homeless person in another country. I'm a people person, not an animal person.
That being said, I married an animal person. When we were first married, C.J. begged and begged for a dog. When I made the comment, "I would get a cat before I got a dog", he quickly began begging for a cat. This went on for about 8 months straight, and then I surprised him with Tansy. A little black cat. I have to admit, if he is even half the father as he is a cat owner, he's going to be wonderful! He's very patient and loving towards this cat. It sickens me, yet I think it's adorable too.
Since my brother moved in a few weeks ago, I've felt like I'm in college. Work has been slow for C.J. and even more slow for Adam who is still trying to get hired somewhere. So needless to say, both boys spend their days together looking for work and playing with the cat. They both love Tansy and I'm completely outnumbered. When I come home from work, I hear stories about the cat.
Yesterday, when I came home from work I walked into quite a scene. My house was immaculate. SO CLEAN! Dinner was ready. That has happened only 2 other times since I have been married...not that I'm counting:) I was so excited and surprised. I was going on and on with gratitude for these boys. Until I noticed something. There was a new stranger in the house. A little siamese kitten. Cute as can be, I admit. But a complete shock to me. I was introduced to 'our' newest family member. Where are the the hidden cameras???


It seems like every good, long marriage has times when things were tough and the struggles seemed to seem too hard, but then years later they are so greatful to have gone through them. I feel like this is one of those times in my life and marriage.
My husband is self-employed and work is very slow right now. No steady work has been available for about 3 months now. We have my brother (also unemployed) living with us right now as well. I'm working full time, but will lose my job in about 2.5 months when it's time for the baby to come. We will also lose insurance and all steady income at that point. The hormones of pregnancy have fed upon my fears, worries, and exhaustion. But I can't help but know in my heart that these are the moments and times in our life that we will look back on and see the hand of God that has always provided.
These are situations that our parents went through when we were growing up. And their situations were tougher than ours. For instance, when I was younger, I remember going to every hometown football game. This was something I loved...the people, the game, the pork chop sandwiches, the cheering. Still the same wonderful feelings I get when I go a football game as an adult. However, as a child I noticed we usually didn't go to the games until half time(so we could get in free). And after the games, we would wait for the crowd to clear out, and our little family of four would stick around and pick up aluminum cans. Now to my brother and I, this was a game to see who could collect my cans. To my parents, this was recycling money we needed to put food on the table. How humbling for my parents. Parents who would do anything for our little family. Some people would assume that since we were 'lowered' to collecting cans, that life must be pretty bad. Not our family. It all depends on perspective. To us kids, this was a fun memory. Obviously times were extremely tough. I have never met any family who had to do this. I've met most who, like us, bought hand-me-downs, even used cloth diapers, but this is a first. But my parents never gave up, and never seemed discouraged. Because they believed in a God that provided all their needs. God promises that he will take care of the birds who have beautiful coats and always have food. And He promises that if he cares that much about the birds, how much more will He care for us? And He has. I can't ever look back in my life and find a time when I didn't have clothes or food. How fortunate are we....always?? So why should I worry? When did God's promise fail? When in my life did He not provide more than enough? Never. It's exciting to think about the future, not worrysome. Or at least that's how my attitude should be:) Here's to trusting in a God that has never failed, and who I'm greatful to have watching over my family!